Love Isn't Natural (Anymore)

I think I know what love is

But then I get lessons on what it is by others

Then I'm confused with what love is

Is it what you say or what I feel?

Is it what he does or how she shows it?

_______________________________

You might think this to be a pretty straight-forward answer but is it really?

We've all read at least one or two books that attempt to describe to you what love is. For example:

1. You only look at one person in the whole room

2. You feel your heart beat faster when that person is with you

3. You find it a little hard to breathe at times (especially when they're beside you)

4. You can feel your spidey senses tingle

5. You think about that one person right before you sleep

6. And think about that one person right when you wake up

So it's a pretty easy and glaring image when you think about it that way.

But nah, the truth is that it's way more complicated than that isn't it?

If you're already in a relationship then you probably won't relate much because you have already found the comfort of having just one person. You are supposed to focus on that one person anyway. And after being together for some time, you might probably be a little numb and those "hints" from above may have advanced to something else.

This is thus for the group of people like me who are between the lines. 

We simply don't know when we've fallen in love or how to see the signs anymore.

Why?

Part of the reason is because the world has painted an image of what love is supposed to be like. There are all kinds of expectations placed upon love.

"She isn't supposed to stop you from smoking."

"He should support you all the way and for any job if he really loves you."

"She thinks too much so she'll be troublesome in the long run."

"He's a gym junkie so he's obsessed with himself and not you."

"Find a girl who can join us for gaming sessions."

"Find a guy who loves you more than you love him."

Dear Lord. There are just simply too many kinds of advice to listen to.

Of when you're supposedly in love.

We sometimes forget that we are only human and we easily get syok sendiri or happy when someone starts to treat us differently. More so when it is in a good way.

What if I refer back to the top 6 things about how people say you're in love. And I give you alternate scenarios to go with them? Would you still think it was love?

1. You only look at one person in the whole room

     Because he or she is probably the only good-looking one and we're superficial people at some point.

2. You feel your heart beat faster when that person is with you

    Probably you're bad at holding personal conversations or that she might just smell your fart.

3. You find it a little hard to breathe at times (especially when they're beside you)

     They have body odour? Or probably it's just you having an anxiety moment

4. You can feel your spidey senses tingle

    Maybe this is a warning to tell you to stay away from this weirdo!

5. You think about that one person right before you sleep

     Either you're smitten in love, or you're obsessed. Worried about making a mistake?

6. And think about that one person right when you wake up

    You probably have too much free time to not worry about your own life tbh

Okay so the above illustrations are supposed to crack you up. In fact, this post is supposed to be in a way. Because what I'm essentially telling you that, you don't need to listen to all of the advice given to you on what love is like. He could or could not be on your mind the whole time; She may or may not be the one person you want to turn to all the time.

Sometimes the love that we are in has its own struggles. None of us post our problems on social media and that's a good thing. Because personal issues should be solved behind closed doors. But this is also a reminder to many others that everyone has their own struggles so you should stop taking them as an example. Some of us have tough love, rough love, complicated love while some of us have it easy - and that's okay! There's always a reason for things. You just have to be okay with it.

In the end it boils down to you. If you feel like you're in love with someone, take the chance and do something about it. Don't live with 'what ifs' and don't play mind games.

If you're having some sort of good feeling about a person and you want to see where this is going, do it before it's too late. Granted, if like some of us, you have your future to be worried about. Hey! That isn't a bad thing. Love is also about timing and if you can't be lovers, they can always be a good friend. Scratch the whole 'friendzone' crap because I personally feel like it's something that all those people who can't handle failure came up with to feel better.

Having a friend in life is better than being enemies.

It takes more energy to hate someone than to love.

And you only have one shot at this life, with the memories and existence as it is, why not make the best out of it?

Love,

Tasha