Sorry vs Your Pride

Genuine apologies are hard to come by. Sometimes we say it out of habit, sometimes we say it because we just want the fight to end. But are the people who are saying sorry, really at fault? Or is it your pride that they feel sorry for?

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Phrases such as "please", "I'm sorry" and "thank you" are hard to come by. These are the simple basic manners that we were taught as children yet it seems that it is either no longer taught, or people just have horrible memory. Each phrase requires the speaker to be humble and the receiver to receive it humbly as well.

Can you imagine saying "please" with a serious face but gets laughed at instead? Or saying "sorry", only to have been pushed aside? Fortunately, "thank you" hardly receives any discrimination.

Nevertheless, when was the last time you said "sorry" and meant it? Or do you even say it anymore?

Yesterday I was involved with an incident that got me openly criticized and shut up. Rather than making an apology, the other party chose to put the blame on us, expressing his disappointment. Trust me when I say it was not our fault at all.

Now the thing is, I understand we all make mistakes. An apology from him would have simply ended the issue and let it all slide. Just one word was all it took.

However, by taking the route of pushing the blame to another, or shutting the other up, he has lost the respect of others.

The point is, rather than letting your pride kick in, is it not better to just admit the fault and move on? It is not humiliating to ever say "sorry". In fact, I find it rather commendable because not every person has the guts to admit their own fault. 

Even in families, or relationships, or amongst friends, we say "sorry" at times because we know that the fight isn't worth the anger; that the screaming and shouting isn't worth the memories. When I recently had a squabble with a friend, we apologized and hugged it out. We pretty much felt like idiots for quarrelling but we also felt happy knowing that we both cherished the friendship we had. 

If you really don't think it's your fault, talk it out. If the talking out is futile, then I guess we just have to let it slide. You decide if it's worth remembering or not.

You see, if anyone cherishes what they have with you, they would try their best to patch things up, regardless of how hard it is. 

Your pride is not going to feed you. It never will. Instead, humility will take you miles ahead. Sometimes even when you're the one hurt, just be the bigger person to approach the other party.

Saying "sorry" even helps for the smallest of things such as being late for work, buying the wrong movie tickets or eating someone's meal without their permission. The reason is simple, because it tells someone that you know you were in the wrong and you have reflected upon it. It's even more important at work because they know you are responsible.

Granted though, this does not mean you should simply throw the word "sorry" everywhere you go. Don't make it lose its value as well. Or else, people will simply think that you are a habitual "sorry" person who never means his word.

But anyway, you only have one shot at life, at least with the memories in your head. Reincarnation is a whole other topic. But the point is that, won't you want to make more good memories and friends while you can? Not everybody may stay in your life, but if we have to part, I'd like to part in good terms.

xoxo

Tasha G Lim